Tuesday, April 26, 2011

A Heart to Heart Talk With Myself

This year marks a big milestone for me.  I'll be turning 35 in the fall.  As I sit at my desk and reflect on what I've done with my life till this point, I see a fabulous highlight reel along with some major disappointments. 
Wouldn't it be great if we had the opportunity to go back in time and guide our younger self?  I think it would be pretty awesome!!  We could possibly be stopped from making a horrible mistake or be given words of encouragement to continue pursuing our goals even when it seems like it'll never happen.
My first Tuesday Talks blog will feature me talking to my 13 year old self.  As I recall, 1990, was a challenging year.  It's those awkward times as a new teenager when you're trying to find yourself and create your own identity.  I was also in the 9th grade, the first year of high school.  These are the times you should really focus on your school work and seriously consider a career path you'd like to follow.  Besides that, there's peer pressure, dating dilemmas, proms, drivers ed, college applications, SAT's and ACT's to name a few.  
Here is my advice to the timid, studious 13 year old Cydania as she prepares for her first day at North Babylon High School in New York.
Dear Cydania The Younger,
1. Please don't always keep your head in the books.  It's okay and encouraging to have a social life.  Compromise with your mother so you can go out and have fun with your friends once a week.  It's really beneficial to be social and people oriented.  This helps greatly as you get older and need to network or want to ask a cute boy out.  There's more to the world than the four walls in your house and in your room. 
2.  Cydania, carefully choose a career path.  Pick one with longevity, where there will be a constant need for your skills & one where you can make a difference.  Perhaps moms are right?  You've had really good grades, so no wonder she wants you to go in the medical, legal or educational field. 
3. As a well known goo-die two shoes, I'd say it's okay to be rebellious once in a while.  Have a little fun.  It goes back to living a little.  I'm not saying go ahead and do something completely stupid that will land you in jail or harm another person.  If you have a curfew, stay out a little later and see what happens.  Do find a pay phone and call saying you'll be late :)
4. Pay more attention in Science, Technology & Math classes.  You have no idea how cool it will be 20 years later to be a computer geek.  Atari has nothing on what the video game consoles of the future will be like. 
5. As an American, enjoy your youth and innocence.  It appears every decade or so there's something that defines that generation.  You'll remember where you were 50 years down the road when it happened.  Yours was probably the Challenger explosion.  There's a much greater danger ahead.  Continue to not be ignorant to worldly events & other cultures no matter how far away you are.
6. Be more family oriented.  I know I know.  Older people are not as cool as teenagers.  However, you do have a very hip 79 year old grandma.  You were one of a handful of grand-kids that didn't grow up near immediate family.  Try to visit those out of state more often, call, write and go to family reunions if possible.  You never know.  You might learn something or heaven forbid have fun.  There will always be delicious southern cooking :)
7. If there's only one suggestion you chose to follow, do your best to have more talks with your mom.  There's now a term for her: tiger mom.  It will be to your benefit to engage in mother/daughter talks and just enjoy each others company.  Talk about boys, how do you know when you're in love, how life was decades earlier and other stuff before it's too late. 
Your biggest supporter,
Cydania The Elder
PS-You better remain a Mets fan though dark days are ahead.  Don't worry about the Rangers, they'll win the Stanley Cup before you know it. 


  1. I've had that thought often myself! If only we could get teenagers to realize that adults are speaking from experience and not just trying to be annoying! :)

  2. I've wondered what it would be like if my life went exactly the way I wanted it to (from the point of view of a certain age, like 8, 13, 21, 25 years old)-- would I have a "better" life if things worked out the way I'd wanted? Maybe not; for one thing, I wouldn't know the same people I do now.